A Pride Month Special: My Experience As Queer
- Jordan Masters
- Jun 22
- 3 min read
Happy Pride to all (except the cis het men and the government)! If you haven't figured it out, I'm queer! And I thought it would be the perfect time to tell you all about my experience. It's been a rollercoaster, so strap in!
Looking back, it was obvious I liked women. I mean, I was searching for girls kissing on my family computer as early as sixth grade! Plus, I maybe fixated on my female friendships a bit too much. However, I didn't really realize that this was an option until much later. You see, there was no representation in my family or the media. No one told me it was okay until my junior year of high school when I joined a friend group of mostly queer kids (shout out to the best). They used to always joke that I was one of them. Eventually, it wasn't a joke anymore. I truly owe them everything, as they were the first people to accept me as I was. I came out as bisexual during my senior year of high school, but only to them. I didn't want it to be my whole identity. Now, I know that I was just scared of how others would view me. I wish I could tell my younger self to be loud and proud of who she is. Anyway, I didn't really pursue women for a while because I was terrified of the unknown. I had absolutely no clue how to be in a relationship with or even approach a woman. You could say I was the babiest of baby gays. When I was a freshman in college, I came out to my parents over the phone. All I said during our weekly phone call was "Also, I'm bisexual." They were quite surprised but expressed that they would support me no matter who I loved. However, they didn't really believe me until much later, and for good reason. I still didn't actively pursue women. I think I was trying to convince myself that I was attracted to men. My compulsory heterosexuality (just look up the lesbian masterdoc if you're confused) was raging throughout my teenage years. Frankly, it still creeps in from time to time. After a while, I seriously started to wonder whether I was simply a lesbian or if I was just frustrated from numerous failed heterosexual relationships. I decided to commit to only women for a while, and honestly, have been so much happier ever since. I may never truly feel a part of one single category, but who cares?! We are who we are and love who we love. Sexuality is a spectrum, and I'm definitely on it! I'm still me, and that's what matters!
And I will not end this post without acknowledging my insane privilege. I'm a white, straight-passing woman with mostly supportive parents. I have never felt less than or unloved for who I am. However, there are people everywhere who don't have that same positive experience. And to those people, you are never alone, even when it may feel like it. We see, love, and support you! Please always be kind to one another! It's all we can do in this crazy world. Below are a few resources for the LGBTQ+ community and ways you can support them! Happy Pride and stay safe!
Trevor Lifeline: 1-866-488-7386
Trans Lifeline Hotline: 877-565-8860 LGBT National Hotline: 888-843-4564
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